Last weekend my friend invited me to accompany her to a wedding in town. Apparently she got her invitation from a friend’s friend. The venue was not so much crowded as one would expect of a wedding since it was only invited guest present. While at the wedding I learnt that the couple had been living together for the last thirteen months or so and had hence decided to formalize matters through a wedding in church. It was a colorful day with the theme color being yellow and a soft touch of red. The bride was in a beautiful, white, shiny gown with a 21 inch train. Her face was well covered in a small beautiful veil. The groom was in a black neatly kept tuxedo suit and black shiny shoes.
After the wedding I kept thinking how such a wedding would have been if the couple had decided to go the traditional way. What colors would have probably being incorporated and how would the dressing of both the bride and groom have looked like?
We have actually lost so much by embracing modern ways of doing things especially in weddings.
I have had the opportunity to attend a traditional wedding that I really enjoyed. I followed from step one to the wedding day and it was very brilliant. It is quiet tedious and time consuming but at the end of it all I think it is worth.
Traditionally, for example in the Kikuyu culture there were at least five steps that the boy and girl together with their families had to go through before they officially got married. It all begins with the groom to be visiting the girls home with his friends to the last step when he brings in his parents when paying dowry. All this takes roughly two or when there are delays three years. This also happened in the Luhya and Gusii community.
I believe this is very important because the couple got to know each other pretty well before they engaged into marriage unlike today when a boy meets a girl and six months down the line they get married. Traditionally the boy and girl didn’t engage in sex before marriage as it was a taboo. Traditionally weddings were a matter of many communities coming together unlike today where we find that most are only attended by invited guests.
Traditionally weddings were quit cheaper then since even the couple’s outfits were made from readily available traditional materials. In the Kikuyu community for example, the wedding attires were made from skin, decorated with beads work. The Maasai used a shuka and colorful beads to decorate both the bride and groom.
In place of the creamy cakes served today, a couple would share porridge from a calabash. In the Kikuyu community the couple shared a piece of a goats shoulder.
Blessings for the newly weds came in different styles: in the Maasai community the bribes father spit on the brides head and breast while in the Kalenjin community brides were bathed in sandalwood oils.
Traditionally presents included blankets, sugar, cowry shells, beads or skin. This was much cheaper and affordable.
All this has been overtaken by the modern style which is very expensive.
I think it is high time we became proud of whom we are and embraced our traditions.
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